Monday, February 27, 2006

A Letdown and a Fairy Tale

The Olympics are over. I feel like I am missing something. I would come home, ride my bike and watch the Olympics. Eat dinner while watching the Olympics. Now nothing... Deal or No Deal was on but even that did not seem to have the same appeal as the Olympics did. I guess it will take a few days for my schedule to get back to normal.

Today's topic is a fairy tale of sorts (as told by my hubby).

Many, many years ago, in a suburban development somewhere in this great country, a housing developer got the brilliant idea for the Magic Chute. What is the magic chute you ask?? It is the hole in the wall that leads to the basement. What do you do with this hole in the wall that leads to the basement?? You throw clothes down there. Why?? So that they come back clean. Who cleans them?? I don't know that it what makes the chute so magic. I throw my dirty clothes down this hole in the wall that leads to the basement and the next day, I open my closet door and VOILA! There the clothes are all nice and clean and pressed. It must be magic for I am not the one who cleans them. This seems to happen every few days. So it must be magic, right??

Notice folks that this was my hubby's version of the story. Not mine. My version goes something like this.

Some asshole decided that instead of having guys leave their dirty clothes on the floor for their wives to pick up, put in a basket and carry to the basement to wash them he would put a hole in the wall so that guys could throw their clothes down so that we could wash them. This is all fine and dandy except for the fact that the clothes never stop falling from the ceiling in the basement. I can go down at 5:00pm and the basket will be empty. At 6:00pm, it will be full of dirty clothes. Usually it is my hubby's sweaty, smelling, gross workout clothes. Now I have to wash, fold, in some cases iron them and bring them back upstairs and put them away. When is it my turn to dump stuff down there and have it come back all nice and clean??

It's a travesty, I tell ya!!

p.s.... anyone know of a good Chinese laundry on the south side of town that still does laundry by the pound?? I used to love to take our clothes there. It was like a dollar a pound to wash and iron your clothes. I was sad when they tore the one down to make it a patio/outside deck for a bar.

ZOBMONDO!!

Would you rather....

In a fight, be armed with an eight-inch knife

----OR----

a crowbar?

I am going with the crowbar. More leverage when swinging it.

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Election Night and the Zoo

Every election, I work for a company that puts the results on TV. It is a gravy job that for the amount of actual 'work' I do, I am highly overpaid. Last night was no different. We had to get the results for about 60 races. Most of them we get off the internet or the League of Women Voters has people at different locations to call in the results. R & E run the show. R has been doing this for about the last 6-7 years or so now. For the most part, I like the people that I do this with. Except for one..... the skank. Every bar has one and Big Momma's is no different. This skank has a thing for my hubby. They went to high school together and I always end up hearing about how hubby and his friends were soooo popular and they ignored people like the skank. Hello... there is a reason why!! You are a skank. She used to be ok. As the years have gone by she has become more of a pain in everyone's side. I think it has to do with the fact she can't find a man. Back to a few sentences ago. Hello... there is a reason why!! You are a skank. You know it was bad when everyone would race to get to the bar on Packer Sunday's so that they wouldn't have the last seat at the bar and have to sit next to her for a whole game.

This skank also has a group of friends. More like a zoo. We have the Koala. We would rip on her at Packer games when she would rival Bruce Clark for the number of trips back to the food. I think we counted her going back like 7-8 times in one game. Her clothes fit like she has been to the food trough a few too many times. She is famous for her very tight stripped t-shirt that is wayyy to small for her, both around and in length. I am sorry if any of you are reading this while eating. Didn't mean to gross you out. The other friend is Muskrat hair. She is a bitch with some poofy, teased, hairsprayed to death, brownish pile of something on her head. It kinda looks like a dead animal. She is just not a very nice person.

So back to my original thought here... For two hours last nite, I had to listen to the skank cry (literally) over the fact that our friend, Dave had died and how she misses him sooooo much. And how good it was to see his family again. She has never met them before in her life. I think she was trying to impress the others there. The funny thing is that we all know better. Then I had to listen to her talk about her 'teaching' job. She works for minimum wage in a daycare. That is not being a teacher. You need to have a degree for teaching. I do like to be a bitch back at her tho' I made sure that I rubbed it in that there was a big group of us going to the hockey game on Sat. nite and see Sugarland play and she wasn't invited. I apologize to everyone now if she show up at the game. I can be such a bitch sometimes... and it is fun :) Okay, thats enough of that.... no more bitchin' about skanks. Thanks for listening tho'.

Tomorrow, hubby and I are taking my two oldest nieces to the museum to see an IMAX movie and for dinner. The kids are 10 and 4 so that should be interesting. I'll let you know how that goes later.

I was watching Idol tonight and I love Ace. I don't know his last name but he is HOT!! great eyes. hubba hubba.

So, I see that our friend DJW has taken his blog down again. He does this about once a month. Not sure why he does it but.... hey, he'll be back in a few weeks.

ZOBMONDO!!

Would you rather...

Be confronted on the street by a loud angry panhandler for a week straight

----OR----

by an unbearably persistent Bible thumper?

Going with the Bible thumper... they are kinda fun to get into discussions with. You can always talk them around in circles.

Coming attractions: A fairy tale.... The Magic Chute.

Monday, February 20, 2006

Book Review and More

I had off today for Presidents' Day. You would think that I would then remember that the Post Office is closed. Nooooo.... I had to get some .02 stamps. Apparently, they raised the price a while back and now I can't mail a letter. Does that tell you how long it has been since I mailed anything?? I use internet bill pay thru my bank's website so I never have to mail a bill. I think the last thing I mailed was Christmas cards well over 2 months ago.

I just finished reading a rather good book. A Single Shard by Linda Sue Park. It is considered juvenile fiction but is appropriate for all ages. A really nice story that takes place in a twelfth century Korean village. Tree-Ear is a 12 year old orphan who lives under a bridge with Crane-man who is a cripple. I would recommend checking this one out from your local library. My am now reading Bob Dole's autobiography. So far it is a good read. I will review it once I am finished.

ZOBMONDO!!

Would you rather....

Be granted the answers to any three questions

----OR----

be granted the ability to resurrect one person?

Wow! This is a hard one. I think of all the people who would be an awesome treat to bring back to life. Some that popped into my head were Jesus, Martin Luther King Jr, Albert Einstein, Da Vinci. But knowing the answers to some of life's greatest mysteries would also be cool. Which came first? the chicken or the egg? Do aliens really exist? I think in the long run, I have to go with bringing back someone.

Friday, February 17, 2006

Random Thoughts

A sure sign that spring is near is not if the groundhog sees his shadow or not, it is the day the pitchers and catchers report for spring training. I love baseball. The Brewers have gone thru a rough stretch but it seems like since Selig no longer owns them things have turned around. I am optimistic. Hubby on the other hand refuses to go to games since they went on strike several years ago. I don't get that but..... we watch ever single game on tv.

I have a feeling that my tulips that poked thru the ground last month are dead. I just suck at growing plants. I swear I am just going to buy fake stuff and plant that. Never have to water it and it never dies. They make some stuff that looks rather real from a distance.

StB is going for the 24 in 24 challenge. I encourage you all to stop over at his site and cheer him on!! He will need the good thoughts as the nite wears on! He started at 6:00pm tonite and will end at 6:00pm tomorrow nite.

Since it snowed out yesterday the number of idiots who are driving without clearing their windows, brake lights or turn signals off has increased. That is one of my pet peeves. How hard is it to brush the snow off of your car. I seen a guy this morning who had a pizza sized hole in his back window and drivers side windo cleared off. The windshield was about half cleared off. You could not see his brake or turn lights. I wish the cops would ticket for that more.

Have you ever clicked the 'Next Blog' link on the upper right hand corner?? I will do that from time to time and get some very interesting stuff. Lots of religious and political blogs. Here are a few that I just found when I clicked the 'Next Blog' button.
  1. http://shoutingloudly.blogspot.com/ - techie/political blog... not too bad
  2. http://shewouldhaveapinkblog.blogspot.com/ - a 20-ish actress/model/college student...4 out of 10
  3. http://alisonblogs.blogspot.com/ - a guy who live in Alaska and studies the snow and ice...also not bad - interesting pics
  4. http://willdiadorashoes.blogspot.com/ - some crap on shoes... couldn't stand to read more than a few sentences... bypass this one
  5. http://broadcastellan.blogspot.com/ - something about old movies. boring...

ZOBMONDO!!

Would you rather...

Always spit when you talk

----OR----

always be spit on when spoken to??

Well, if you catch me when I am drinking I would have to go with spit when you talk. I tend to talk a bit fast when I drink. I probably spit and no one has told me so.

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Snow Day

The weather was kinda lousy out today so I worked from home. Got some stuff done but it was hard when Riley wanted to lay on my lap for about 2 hours while it stormed. Yes, stormed. We had lightening and thunder here. Yes, this is Wisconsin and it is February. Riley doesn't like it when it storms and loves to cuddle. Good thing he is a small guy so I can move my arms around him while typing and stuff.

I was reading a story about Westminster Dog Show and how the dogs sometimes have problems getting to and around New York. Here is a funny excerpt.

"I'm flying with my Neapolitan mastiff named Strider," says Joyce Wolfe of Beverly Hills, California. "The dog weighs 170 pounds and his crate is the size of a Mini Cooper, so we have to check in at the oversized baggage counter. It's costing me $400 to fly him to New York and the ground transport service wants nearly $250 to ferry him to and from the airport!
"When he gets nervous he pants and when he pants, he farts. It's going to be quite a ride."


Panting and farting - what a life....

While driving around town last summer, I noticed that a house had put in a new circular driveway. It looked nice. All new blacktop. Then about a week later I noticed that they had striped it. As in painting lines down the middle and marking out the parking spots, including 2 handicap spots. Now this driveway isn't all that big. Maybe 30 feet long.... tops. Now it looks like a Wal-Mart parking lot. You never see any cars parked in the driveway either. Are they like 12 and think that is cool.... Who knows.

ZOBMONDO!!

Would you rather...

Always have to wear wet socks

----OR----

always have to wear wet underwear?

This is a tough one... I have a foot thing and hate to have my feet cold, wet or exposed. You will notice that I very rarely wear sandals in the summer and have socks on alot. I also hate wearing wet undies. Don't want to get the twat (love that word, hey Gambino!) all shriveled and pruney.... feet, twat, twat, feet..... oh, I don't know!!!

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Being Sick Sucks

I can't shake this stupid cold!! It is pissing me off. Royally. I have not gotten a good nite sleep in almost a week. Now it is settling in my chest and I keep coughing and hacking up crud from my lungs. When I lay down to sleep, it backs up into my nose and I can't breathe. Cough or breath... tough choice. I broke down today and bought some cold medicine. I hate taking anything other than aspirin. My body does not play well with anything that may have a sleep aid in it. The last time I took some Tylenol PM, I scared the poop outta hubby when I woke up screaming with night terrors.

Something I have seen quite a bit over the last few days is people doing u-turns in a controlled intersection. What is it about the no U-turn sign on the pole that people can't see?? The one guy today almost got broadsided by a car going the opposite direction. That would have taught him a lesson.

This week we got our performance reviews at work. At the same time, my teammates and I found out that if you were rated a 3 or below (the scale is 1 being the highest, 5 the lowest, with 3 being competent) you did not get a raise or a bonus. WTF?!?! Luckily, for me I was a high 2 and got a nice raise but my bonus was less than half of what it was last year. That sucked!! I know that 2 people on my team did not get anything this year. The one guy I work with here was more than a bit pissed. He worked on a big project this past year that saved the company over $300,000/year... and that is the thanks he gets. I have the feeling that he will be leaving as soon as he finds another job. I can't blame him. I would do the same thing if that were me. My boss, who I really like, was also pissed when she found out that it was her bosses boss who made the raise and bonus payout decisions. What really sucks is that we reported to him from late August until November of last year and barely met him. And he is supposed to now what kind of job I did throughout the year?? Not very fair.

ZOBMONDO!!

Would you rather....

Have your thumb and first finger glued together for life in the 'OK' sign

----OR----

be forced to say 'thank you' before every sentence??

I am going with saying thank you. People would then think that I was raised right and am very polite. Even if I am just saying F#$K you!!

Monday, February 13, 2006

Monday humor... or not....

This may come as a surprise to those of you not living in Las Vegas, but there are more Catholic churches in Vegas than casinos. Not surprisingly, some worshippers at Sunday services will give casino chips rather than cash when the basket is passed. Since they get chips from so many different casinos, the churches have devised a method to collect the offerings. The churches send all their collected chips to a nearby Franciscan Monastery for sorting and then the chips are taken to the casinos of origin and cashed in. This is done by the chip monks.

Yeah, I know it was bad... but still kinda cute.

Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show is on tonite. Riley is addicted to it. He sits in front of the tv and just stares at the screen. Every so often he will bark at the tv and run back and forth like he trying to get the tv dog's attention. It is kinda cute. I will try to take a picture and post it later on.

ZOBMONDO!!

Would you rather....

Take a bumpy two-mile ride sitting wedged (feet hanging out) in the main compartment of a small metal shopping cart

----OR----

take a 25-mile ride in the empty but rotating bin of a cement truck?

I am going with the shopping cart. I think that you would get tossed around less in the cart.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Ok, I Think I'm Back Now

I am finally feeling better. I have had a nasty cold for the last few days. It started on Wed and by Friday really sucked. I went and played poker (I really should have stayed home) on Friday nite and felt so-so. Thanks goodness the church smoker was non-smoking. My fever broke overnite and by Sat. it had settled into my chest. So now I am just hacking alot but feel much better.

Friday, hubby and I played poker in a church smoker. It was fun and I will do it again. I was just happy that I lasted about an hour longer than hubby did. Didn't make any money or stay around long enough for the food. I was home by 8:30 pm. Hubby went up to the bar where he ran into the rest of the gang. Gambino called me and talked me into playing in another poker tourney on Sat. afternoon at Big Mama's. I said yes. Sat morning rolls around, I was not really wanting to play but hubby already payed for me so I was kinda stuck. Good thing I played. I finished 2nd!!! That's right 2nd place. Netted myself a cool 150 bucks!! whooo hooo....We started with 38 people. I outlasted hubby, K, A, Gambino, and even the infamous StB. I got luckier than hell a few times but felt that I played a solid game. I think that most of the guys, who did not know me, under-estimated me. Here I was drinking soda, barely talking cuz my throat hurt and still a bit feverish. That was the third tourney I have ever entered and I was very proud that I did as well as I did :)

The Olympics are on and I am addicted. I have both dvr's going to record stuff so I can watch later. I may have to delete other stuff so I don't run out of room. Who would have thought that 80 hours of room is not enough?!?!

Went to my parents for hubby's birthday dinner. Always an adventure. My sister and her hellacious rugrats.... yikes... I am so glad that we have dogs and they are good dogs. My oldest niece, C, is almost 11 and my sister wonders where C gets an attitude from...rolling her eyes and talking back... Last week I stopped over there and heard my sister call C a little bitch... WTF!!!!! All I know is my mom never, ever swore at us and when she did damn was the strongest word that came from her mouth. Hello, she only repeats what she sees and hears! Then the kicker was that my sister kicked C out of the house. again WTF?!?! where is a 10 year old going to go. So C walked down to my parents house, who live about 1 block away, at 11:30 pm at nite and stayed there. My sister said that if C wasn't going to live by her rules then she was going to call social services and let them put her in a foster home. My sister is soooooo fu$%ed up. Those poor kids. Luckily, hubby is a good sport and is going to take C to the father/daughter Valentine dance for Girl Scouts next Sat nite.

ZOBMONDO!!!

Would you rather....

Marry your first boyfriend/girlfriend

----OR----

marry someone your parents chose for you??

I am going for my first boyfriend. He was a good guy. My parents don't choose my Christmas presents very well, trust them with picking my spouse, no way!!

Monday, February 06, 2006

I'm Back

Sorry it has been awhile since my last post. The past week has just been really exhausting and hectic. My eyes are finally looking like normal and not all puffy.

The funeral for Dave was beautiful. He was buried with military honors and it was extremely emotional to see the honor guard folding the flag and presenting it to his brother. Gambino gave an awesome eulogy as well as did Pete and my hubby. There were lots of tears shed and many great memories shared with family and friends. One of the best stories was of our friend, Mas. Dave always called Mas his little buddy. Dave was the Skipper and Mas was Gilligan, his little buddy. After the luncheon on Friday, one of the guys that Dave worked with at the Legion post came up to Mas and introduced himself. They chatted for a few minutes and the guy said to Mas, 'Yeah, Dave always said that he was the Skipper and I was his little buddy.' Mas' jaw hits the floor and he just kinda looks at the guy and says 'yeah, that was nice...' and they part ways. Mas comes back to the group and re-tells the story. We are all laughing our asses off. Someone had then made the comment about how many other little buddies did Dave have?? Was Dave two-timing Mas?? Mas said that he thought about speaking at church and was going to tell the everyone how he was Dave's little buddy. Good thing he didn't or who knows how many other people would have stood up and said that they were Dave's little buddy as well.

Went to P&K's last nite to watch the Super Bowl. I have to admit, I really did not watch much of it. I spent most of the evening talking or playing poker. Yes, I took 2nd place to StB's 1st. I won a cool 10 bucks!! woo hooo... K helped me put my new pedals on my bike. So today I spent the first 15-20 minutes of my ride trying to get my shoes clipped in and out of the pedals. Thank god, I was on my trainer and not really riding or I would have fallen over more than once. I am getting the hang of clipping my right foot in but the left one is a bit trickier. I guess my left foot is not as coordinated. It felt nice to ride today. The last few days did not afford me the time to ride at all. I am still trying to catch up on the 50 million loads of laundry. I swear I changed clothes twice, sometimes three times in one day.

ZOBMONDO!

Would you rather.....

Have every driver but you be a 'student driver'

----OR----

have every driver (except you) on the road be at least 75 years old?

I am going with the student driver on this one. I can tolerate someone who is learning (hopefully good habits). We all had to learn at some point in time. Let's jut hope they grow up to be good drivers.